A Song for My Mood

Music is a good gage of what I am feeling at the moment. Tonight, on my walk, I heard this song:


It kind of fit what I have been feeling lately. Loveless.  I am not sure what has gotten into me lately. I just feel incredibly lonely.  Maybe it is the spring air here in Boston or the fact I see people out and about holding hands or that I don’t seem to be wanted but I feel pretty hopeless in the love category. That is the one area of my life I am truly and utterly dissatisfied with.

Sometimes I think that I should have gotten married when I had the chance but then again, I would be in the same place right now either way, most likely.

I went to see Mom’s grave yesterday. My father’s parents are also at the National Cemetery in Bourne. I took Dad with me and we spent a little time at each grave. Dad’s way of grieving is different than my way so I tried to accommodate him as I best I could. I will go back again by myself so I can spend more time down there.

How was everyone’s weekend?

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2 Responses to A Song for My Mood

  1. I know that how hard it is to feel lonely and loveless. I've been there. I still get lonely at times. Sounds like you're getting out and walking, though, and that is such a good thing to do for yourself. I need to do more of that.One step at a time. Feeling lonely and feeling loveless–those feelings are not permanent.

  2. 71º & Sunny says:

    Hi Jen. I'm sorry you're feeling lonely. That is a very painful experience. I'm glad you recognize that getting married when you had a chance would probably not change your situation. In fact, it might be worse, if you were in a bad marriage.It is so very easy to look at another couple holding hands and to think, oh they're so lucky, I wish I had that, etc. I know, because I've done that. But you know, you really don't know what their life is like when you're not looking. I knew a couple who were extremely lovey-dovey in public and you would have thought that life was bliss between them. Let's just say they are no longer together.Tina made an excellent point, feelings are not permanent. I know it's hard to believe that when we're in the midst of them, but it really is true.Um, my weekend was just ok. Actually, I've had better. I did lots of errands. I'm full of anxiety because I have a lot to do this week, and I'm putting it off. Ugh.

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